Common Myths about CSA
Common Myths about CSA
From Victim to Perpetrator
When discussing CSA with various friends and acquaintances, the most commonly held myth is sexual offenders were themselves victims of child sexual abuse. Currently, there is no empirical evidence to support this claim. The Canadian Centre for Child Protection states, “the majority of individuals who abuse children were not sexually abused as children.” Anecdotally, I know numerous survivors, and they have not grown up to be sexual offenders; more often, they are staunch fighters for children’s rights. I have also heard of a case from one of my social worker friends where an offending youth was sexually abused in childhood. More research into the issue is needed.
A sexual offender looks a certain way.
A sexual offender, as with human traffickers, can look like you or me. Often these individuals can appear very likable, even charismatic. They can be from any race, ethnic background or faith. They can come from any socio-economic group. This deviant behaviour crosses all social boundaries.
Strangers are the most common perpetrators of sexual offences
In most cases (80-90%), the perpetrator is known to the youth or child. Often the perpetrator is someone of significance to the youth or child, such as a family member, family friend, family acquaintance, neighbour, teacher or coach.
A youth or child would tell another adult right away if they were sexually abused
There is a myriad of reasons why a youth or child will not disclose sexual abuse. This behaviour is confusing for a kid. Remember the human brain is still developing up until your early 20s. As part of the grooming process, the offender will manipulate the youth or child into believing the sexual exploitation is “normal” or “love-based.” Youth and children are at a cognitive disadvantage. The offender often uses guilt, shame or blame coercing the youth or child into believing they are a “willing participant.” And it is not uncommon for a sexual offender to use threats like:
“I won’t love you anymore.”
“No one will believe you.”
“I’ll tell everyone you started it.”
“I’ll hurt your pet.”
“I’ll hurt your parents.”
“I’ll kill myself and it will be your fault.”
“I’ll go to jail; you don’t want me to go to jail, do you?”
“I’ll hurt you.”
Statistics from 2015 highlight: “More than 9 in 10 (93%) victims of childhood physical and/or sexual abuse did not report the abuse to either police or child protection services before they turned 15. In fact, the majority of victims (67%) did not speak to anyone, including friends or family”. https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/en/pub/85-002-x/2017001/article/14698-eng.pdf?st=c2gcKF4a
Knowing this means it’s our responsibility as adults to learn the signs of concerning behaviour in adults, youth and children. It also means we must learn how to start the conversation if we do observe concerning behaviours.
